I was looking through my archives and came across this in draft form. It was originally written May 2010.
The work of the Holy Spirit, of course!
Here's the story...
So, I'm sitting in Mass on Good Shepherd Sunday listening to Father's homily. This in and of itself is remarkable enough. The two oldest boys were in the Children's Liturgy and Doodlebug wanted nothing to do with me. He wants daddy lately, only during Mass though. So I got to listen (should have known something was up at this point...) And listen I did. Well, sort of anyway.
About halfway through I hear HIM. "Have another baby". Plain as day. My response was a little less than thrilled, "NO!".
In His church.
While listening to the words of the Holy Spirit.
I said no.
Talk about a lack of obedience.
Not one to be easily put off, He pulled out the big guns. The Professor.
Over lunch later that day, The Professor says (looking at the crib mattress in the foyer - returned the night before by my SIL), "mommy, we should save that mattress for the next baby."
Needless to say this threw me for a loop. Not sure how to respond, I take another bite to buy some time. I formulate a response along the lines of "we don't know God's plans for our family, but daddy and I are praying about it and it's up to God if He wants us to have another baby." He's only 6, so we haven't explained much about how babies come to be, nor about NFP.
Curious, I ask him, "how long have you been thinking about another baby? Is this something you've been thinking about for a while, or only just today?"
Input from the rest of the peanut gallery is in favor of another brother, not a sister, but specifically a brother.
I'm embarrassed to say that I was a little less than enthusiastic. My response was to give the Lord a laundry list of things I needed Him to do before I would listen. Great, huh?
I guess I was smart enough to put the one thing that mattered on that list though. "If this is truly Your plan, please work on my heart."
And He did.
Slowly but steadily over the next several weeks, there came a steady thaw. I went from "absolutely not", to "well, if it's Your will, then I guess so. I certainly don't want to make You mad, but I'm not happy about this.", to " I want to be obedient, so OK." to "please send us a baby. Healthy physically, emotionally and spiritually." (I've learned from others' misfortunes to carefully word that prayer).
So here I sit hoping that He will deliver soon. The boys are all excited about the prospects of another boy in the house.
Updated June 3,2012
Well..."soon" turned into a year. He did eventually send us another son. Healthy in all respects as asked for. Please believe that MANY prayers of Thanksgiving have been offered up for this grace.
In the meantime He had more plans for us. God's plans are of course always perfect. In fact, He got us involved in exactly that...God's Plan for a Joy Filled Marriage. It's a program put together by Christopher West based on John Paul II Theology of the Body. It's a marriage prep program that focuses on the sacramental rather than the secular side of marriage. It's wonderful. I can't say enough good things about this program. If you have the chance to get involved, you won't regret it. We were approached by our parish's NFP teaching couple, also good friends of ours to be presenters for it. We've since presented it twice, once while I was quite pregnant! Quite an impact it had too.
BTW... the list of things that I needed Him to do...they (almost) all got done. And in hindsight, my timing would not have been good. His is so much better. Oh how He loves us!